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Self-empowerment and advocacy for survivors
Throughout this publication, the word “empowerment” has been used countless times. There is good reason for this. A woman’s abuser takes power and control from her through the use of physical force, threats and coercion. Empowerment restores a woman’s power and control over her own life and affords her the opportunity to see herself as a strong survivor who can participate actively in securing safety for herself and her children.
A woman victimized by domestic violence deserves to tell her story to a non-judgmental, empathetic person. It is critically important to let her know that she is believed and that the violence is not her fault. This might be her first—and perhaps last—opportunity to be fully heard. By listening to a survivor talk about what has happened to her, you will have a greater understanding of her situation and can discuss options that are grounded in her experience, hopes and fears.
When people working with a woman who has been battered inform her of available resources and let her empower herself through education—instead of taking control and making decisions for her—it is more likely that the she will be equipped to advocate for herself both immediately and throughout her life. That is not to say that advocates cannot provide additional assistance securing resources when asked by the women with whom they are working. It also is important to remember that victims of domestic violence are, first and foremost, people. All too often women who are beaten by their intimate partners are saddled with labels and diagnoses by well-intentioned, yet misguided, people who simply want to help. Unfortunately, the labels that are applied to women who have been battered in particular moments in their lives do not reflect the total context and complexity of their experiences. People who work with survivors should keep in mind that these individuals can and do harness the enormous power of their own experiences to move beyond the violence that subdues the spirit within.
THE LIFE PROCESS OF ASSISTING WOMEN VICTIMIZED BY DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Listening, informing and educating can lead to empowerment for a victim when the LIFE process of assistance is used. Through this process, victims gain knowledge, and knowledge is power. This process happens in degrees, but it does happen.
LISTEN
- Provide a safe place for a woman to talk and tell her story.
- Afford sufficient time for her to become comfortable and able to discuss the details of her abuse.
- Being with her story, history, concerns and questions. Affirm her experience and what she is saying. Clarify anything you, or she, does not understand.
- Identify her hopes and fears and the resources she is currently using or might need.
- Help her create a personalized safety plan.
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INFORM
- Tell her about available resources.
- Explore her circumstances and discuss the worst- and best-case scenarios as they relate to each of the remedies available to her.
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FACILITATE
- Help her to critically assess her chosen course of action (including her safety plan) and to understand the likely consequences.
- Schedule specific times and dates for ongoing contacts or follow-up.
- Explore all contingency plans.
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EMPOWER AND ASSIST HER
- Educate a woman so she can advocate for herself, thereby taking control of her life and making it safer for herself and her children.
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