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The people harmed by domestic violence |
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 About one in four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime. |
—Tjaden, P., & Thonennes, N. (2000). Extent, nature and consequences of intimate partner violence: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey. Washington, DC: U.S. Department of Justice.
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| Having a verbally abusive partner was the variable most likely to predict that a woman would be victimized by an intimate partner. |
—Ibid.
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| In 2001, 20 percent of violent crime against women was intimate partner violence, compared to 3 percent of violent crime against men. |
| —Rennison, C. M. (2003). Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001. Washington, DC: U.S. Department of Justice.
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Domestic violence is unlike other crime
While domestic violence has certain similarities to other forms of family violence—such as child abuse, child-to-parent violence, sibling violence or elder abuse—it has certain unique characteristics that make it distinct. Domestic violence distorts what is supposed to be a partnership based on mutual respect. Neither partner has a legitimate role in disciplining or controlling the other. When domestic violence permeates a relationship, the abuser and victim no longer share equal rights and responsibilities within the partnership.
SAFETY SHOULD BE PARAMOUNT
Safety must be the fundamental guiding principle in any and all efforts to assist those escaping the violence and control of their intimate partners. All contact and interventions with a survivor must account for the risks she faces when she seeks help. The reality for women victimized by domestic violence is that the risk of danger is greater when they leave their abusive relationships.
A woman who has been battered further risks the safety of herself and her children through the process of disclosing abuse, separating from a batterer, seeking child support or reporting her batterer’s abuse of her children. There will be unintended consequences for a woman if interventions are not based on safety and her assessment of her situation.
EMPOWERING SUPPORT IS ESSENTIAL
The woman experiencing domestic violence is the expert on the violence in her life. She has the best sense if her batterer will carry through on his threats if she tells her story, goes to work or pursues child support. Anyone seeking to help a victim of domestic violence must encourage and respect the choices she makes. This reinforces her autonomy and can empower her with the knowledge that she can survive outside of her abusive relationship.
In a non-emergency situation, one of the primary reasons a survivor tells you her story is to seek your services, gather information and resources, investigate her options and be encouraged by a non-judgmental, helpful person.
YOUR ROLE IN ENDING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
The challenge for all of us is to do what we can do. We can meet the challenge with hope. For the truth is that people commit domestic violence, and people can stop it. Your efforts have the potential to save lives, to stop the violence, and to create new opportunities for families living in fear and danger. By its very nature, your work to address domestic violence is an ethical endeavor to further social justice.
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